Tuesday, December 14, 2004
What an upstanding citizen
What did i do? Well, i was scared shitless, but i listened to her, tried to encourage her to rise above this, to see also my point of view, basically taking a softly-softly approach towards an abortion. I told her how much i loved her and how we'd get over this and build a good future to raise a family properly, in time, when we were both ready, happy, stable. She stopped taking my calls at one point and i took a 10 hour bus to see her and reassure her. Basically i didn't want her martyr-ing herself by having the baby, which is just like her to do.
It didn't work. Then i had no alternative but to be more disagreeable because i was feeling so fucking disagreed. Agrieved, betrayed, trapped, bullied. I outlined every possible reason, and all the inherent logic, for us not to have this kid. I pleaded with her (over email, we couldn't talk on the phone any more), i asked her to have someone else's baby if she wanted one so bad, i even called her names, bitch.
It didn't work. Then i had no alternative but to be more disagreeable because i was feeling so fucking disagreed. Agrieved, betrayed, trapped, bullied. I outlined every possible reason, and all the inherent logic, for us not to have this kid. I pleaded with her (over email, we couldn't talk on the phone any more), i asked her to have someone else's baby if she wanted one so bad, i even called her names, bitch.
